Why isn't this fucking Prozac working? I have spent the past three days sullen and depressed, and have had periods in which I have just broken down crying. NAU is such a den of ill-feelings, I feel as though the whole Goddamn world is against me. This school is where it all began, the prominensence in my problems. It wasn't until I was out of the house and on my own in a sense that I couldn't get things together: I've made fewer friends, have had more people ditch me, and I think at times the girls can get mean with their rejection statements. Relationships also last longer if you're lucky enough to have one, so I guess that means that I will never be able to go out with this girl I really like.
Am I ever going to get better?
Is it even worth trying?
I think I am going to die unhappy and alone, and a virgin, which I guess in the grand scheme of things is a stupid thing to be depressed about. God this plane of existence is a shitty one.
"It wasn't meant to be" the five shittiest words in the English language, and is up there along with "You're aren't my type" and "I'm seeing someone" as the worst phrases of all time. Once again, someone I wanted to go out with "wasn't meant to be." You have to love God's sense of humor, he deposits us here on the rock and doesn't gvie us a pertinent instruction manual, just the archaic one known as "The Bible". So why does it seem like some people swim with the sharks and people like me are going against the current and end up getting shoved into jagged rocks. I want to see this "Meant to be" handbook so I can realize what is "meant to be" in my life and spare me all this stupid painful shit that happens day in day out.
